Snapshots Of My Life: Making Friends In Ikea

Yesterday as I sat in the returns section of Ikea, waiting for my number to be called, a heavily “processed” woman, along with her “DUFF”, sat on the bench opposite to me. The only way I can describe the woman is that if goldfish made pornography, she would be the female lead.

As I sat playing Candy Crush on my phone, I could see the goldfish looking at me up and down in what I assume was an attempt to show disdain. As I looked up at her, in a most annoying “I think I am so cute” voice, she looked at me with a snide expression and said “brown shoes with a grey pants, where the hell did you learn to dress like that?”. With that she burst out laughing.

I waited until she was finished having her good laugh over the fact the I was wearing a pair of charcoal grey cargo pants with dark brown hiking boots, stood up and said, “When I get home tonight, I am going to be able to take off my brown shoes and grey pants. The question is, what the hell are you going to do about that face?”

 

3 Comments Add yours

  1. Ohmygosh! I shouldn’t be laughing but you are hilarious! It’s sad when people are so insecure with themselves that they feel like they have to alter their face/body and then insult others who don’t fit into their idea of fashion sense.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Basil Rene says:

      You hit the nail on the head. It’s all about insecurity. I try not to get mad with people, but I have very little patience with stupidity, and if anyone tries to insult or belittle me in any way, I always seem to have a very quick comeback that brings them back down. My wife teased me that she was just probably trying out a new pick up line. I said the only line she would have probably had a fish hook on the end attached to her lip.

      Like

  2. Twyla says:

    To funny !!!!

    Liked by 1 person

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