I am a perfectionist, I admit it. If I do a project I do it to its fullest, and even beyond. I do this not to impress anyone or score points. I do it even if no one is going to see my produce. I just believe that if you are going to do something it just needs to be done properly or not at all.
There are those people don’t share my view and if they could get away with doing something so it just meets their completion requirements, they do. They are happy doing a mediocre job, and that’s their choice, but just don’t do a mediocre job when I am involved, especially when it comes to surgery or any aspect of my health care. But I digress.
I tend to be handy in terms of designing things on a computer and if I did a project for school, for example, flash cards for a certain subject, they come out looking as if they were store bought. I print on glossy photo paper and laminate them, punch holes and attach them to rings. I have been accused of purchasing stuff rather than make it for a project, which I take as a huge compliment.
What really irritates me however is a line that people, mostly those that are envious of your work, love to use, which is “you have way too much time on your hands”. Oh, when someone said that, it used to piss me off, especially if I was having a prednisone moment.
I learned to let it just run off my back, so to speak. Those same sort of people would also use the same line if they see you reading a book or you spoke about enjoying any sort of relaxing free time. This is a phenomenon that really intrigues me. Why must anyone be jealous or envious of the way I spend my time?
These people complained that they never have time to “waste” like I do. I was told that once. I understand that people are busy, some having more than one job and a family to care for, but even if you take ten minutes for yourself, do it. Just do something you love in that little time. Don’t resent other people for their ability to do stuff they love. Why should I be envious of anyone else’s joy and happiness. I urge it. I revel in it. I want to hear more about what makes you happy and about what you did that you loved doing, even if it was for five minutes.
I realize now that we are a society of envy, jealousy and resent. And that saddens me. People are chewing at the bit waiting for someone to fall, to fail. The tabloids are filled with idiotic stories every week of some celebrity’s fall from grace. Something for everyone to laugh about. Why don’t we see articles about what they did to help society, the charitable work, the donation of their time. No one really cares. And so I pledge to just continue to find those moments in my life that bring me joy, and keep them to myself. Why share joys in your life when there is someone ready to try to take that joy away from you? Sometimes, unfortunately, spreading joy would leave you with none of your own.
Now, if anyone tells me anything about having too much time, my reply is “Don’t put upon me your guilt and anger that you don’t allow yourself time to enjoy life”