I do dream at night when I sleep, but I very seldom remember them. Usually they are happy dreams, and flying dreams. Very seldom are they scary. Last night I had a dream that was very disturbing. And so, when I do have one that disturbs me, I think itmust be very significant. So I thought I would share my dream with you.
It begins with me driving through a very affluent town in Westchester County, NY, a town I am very familiar with. I stopped at a store located on a corner opposite a train station where I always stop to get a Frapuccino. I parked in the usual spot that I do around the corner from the store, and went into the store, but as I went in, the quaint magazine store turned into a bodega type store. The place was run down and not familiar at all, and as I turned and looked out the window, I was not in Westchester anymore, but I was in the Bronx. The south Bronx.
I put my drink on the counter and as I looked into my wallet to pay the man behind the counter, all of my money was counterfeit. I told the man that I had cash in the car and I will be right back. As I went around the corner back to my car, there was a crowd of people gathered around my car, and the driver’s side door was open and there was a man sitting inside the car, and from what I could see, he was rummaging around inside the car.
I turned to go the other way when someone in the crowd shouted “Look! That’s the guy from the car” I continued to walk away when someone else shouted
“Hey you! Stop! This your car?” I turned and said yes, and the man that shouted for me to stop motioned for me to go to him. I always planned that if ever anyone tried to carjack me while I was outside of the car that I would throw the keys as far as I can away from me and run in the other direction, but now, in my dream I did what he said. I moved towards him and put my hand out, giving him the key.
“Nice car you have here. What you doing in this neighborhood with these fancy wheels?” the man who shouted at me asked
“Here. Take the keys. Takenthe car” I said
“Oh no. I ain’t drivin’ yo car. You gonna be drivin’ me and my buddy here. Get in the car” he said calmly, but firmly. I did as he said and got into the driver’s seat as he and his friend made their ways into the front passenger and back seats.
“Just drive” he said In my dream, I thought to myself that I am doing exactly what I trained not to do. Leave the scene with the perpetrator. But still I did as they said.
“Where are we going?” I asked
“On a drive. Mighty silly of you to come driving a nice car like this into a neighborhood like this. Draws a lot of attention:” the man said
“So tell me” I asked “Give me the truth. You going to kill me right?” “Sometin like dat” he said In my dream I thought that if they take me somewhere else, they might torture me before killing me and then my body would never be found. My wife would never know what happened to me. I would just disappear. My car would be stripped and burned, and all traces of me, gone.
I slammed my foot as hard as I could on the accelerator and started speeding through the side streets towards the busier streets.
“What you doing man?!” the man shouted to me.
“Well, if you are going to kill me, no way am I going to go alone, and certainly not by your hand”
And with that, I saw my speed was 96 mph, and I looked up at a wall ahead, and turned the car straight towards the wall. I woke up before the car hit. I did everything that I trained myself never to do in a situation like that if it should arise. Lots of people think that dreams have meanings. I think this dream is a warning to me to be aware of my surroundings. So, what do you think this dream means?
Update – I went to see my Buddhist psychotherapist today and told her my dream. After a long conversation, one theory she thinks that it relates to is my sarcoidosis and the amount of people that are “in my business” (doctors) and that I feel like I am giving up control. It may also relate to the fact that every time I go to a doctor or have a test done, I feel like I make two steps back and come up against a wall in my progress, hence the symbology of me “hitting the wall and thereby regaining control”. Hey, it’s feasible.